Draft Letter I Could Never Send To You, And Never Will

Dear Mr P,

Good afternoon, Mr P! How are you? Doing good with your girl? Let's take it as yes because I see that you're finally going public with your relationship since I saw your dp with your girl. Your girl is sho cute I must say. In case you're wondering (but i doubt you'll ever find this letter anyway) I wrote this because this has been bothering me since days, probably if I dig deeper, It has been lingering since the day we said goodbyes to each other, perhaps, almost year ago. So, I'll just let it all out by typing this long-ass-cringey letter so I (hope) I could feel better after, since i knew, if i told just anyone about this, they might just see me as a vulnerable being, and i don't wanna be viewed like that, especially with people i knew.

Okay, back to the things-i-wanted-to-tell-you-but-i-choose-not-to. Boy, I don't miss you in romantic way nor I want your presence next to me whispering comforting things so that I could feel better. I believed I have moved on but sometimes, the thought of you are still lingering on my head. You left a questionable scar on my heart, because I don't know if I really hated you or just want to hear more explanation from you.

Our first meeting were kinda awkward, I know. My friend said you were handsome and kinda my type, but I didn't believe her at first since your display picture were facing other way so I couldn't see your face clearly lol.  I didn't expect too much from you,  I feel like i was out of your league, even I've thought my friend were joking when she said she wanted to introduce me to one of her seniors.

*                    *                   *

You messaged me first.

After days of talking to each other thru messaging app, you suddenly wanted to picked me up at train station which was marked as the day we 1st met, and the first time, a guy, who isn't my father, became an Imaam for maghrib prayer. In our first met. I was going cray

You are the type most girls probably hate, because you took minutes, even hours to reply, or no reply at all AFTER you read the messages. But i always got your reasons, you fall asleep, you were busy, your schedule with your friends, i got it. By then, I used to your habit of messaging. I never complained much, instead, I tried to understand your position, even though I was going crazy inside just to see a reply from you.

It's my first music festival experience ever, to attend, with a guy.

We met up at train station to the festival, and spent the days beautifully. We walked along, nearly a mile, hand-in-hands, to the venue, very happily, eventhough we both drenched by sweat. I was glad because we could saw Lenka's performance not too far from the stage, and sang along eventhough we both didn't know her song that well. And although we didn't watch all performers thru the end of event and were rushing off just to make sure you got your last train, i was genuinely happy. I was dying and contemplating inside if i should update my social media so that everyone could see how happy I was spending the day with you.

You know what happened now? Yes you guessed it right. I don't even want to hear songs by Lenka ever again because it just reminds me of you, or the day i got to spent with you. I. detested. it. so. much.

The Boy was turning 20!

That was the first time a guy spent a birthday with me, only me. I felt so special. You promised me that we were going somewhere to celebrate your birthday. I, too, looking forward for the day very much. I already got you a present, I choose a blue jumper by Pull & Bear and bought a red velvet cake, spent nearly thousands rupiahs for a first  time, to a guy (and we weren't a thing at that time yet) and not regretted it. (But now, I am)

We watched a movie, had a delicious dinner, took photos, and enjoyed the night scenery which were really beautiful that time. As you drove me home, you took a longer way than usual just because you said you wanted to spent more time with me before we reach my home. I probably went "awww" and blurted out random things at that time but trust me I felt amazing.

We finally became a 'thing'.

Dates after dates, we finally reached the relationship stage. It wasn't complicated at all, and we got along very well. Except, you left without a clear explanation after a 30 days.

When we were a thing, I felt beautiful, the feels of longing for someone and vice versa itself had took an amazing effect on myself.  I always wanted to look beautiful in front of you, with the way I did my make up, the way I spoke to you, even when we talked on messenger apps.

That time, we didn't meet for almost a month, when before, we used to meet just for a lunch, dinner, or a talk, probably once a week or more. I tried to understand that you were having midterms so I didn't try to arrange a date. But you, suddenly left me hanging like an idiot. You removed me from social media, and didn't even take a look at my last messages (we were talking just fine before). That's when I thought our relationship were ended and i tried to not be bothered by it.

I thought the reason you were missing was because you had problems with your parents, uni, or friends so that you didn't want to speak to anyone. I don't even know who your friends were instead of that one junior who also my friend too, but she said she didn't know, or maybe he's just bored with you, idk (and i was so mad at her at that time but little did i know, she had some problems too at that time, and we're all good now) and thus why i don;;t have the chance to ask them what's going on with you.

You finally replied my messages

....a WEEK after, with your weak reasoning. You said that you had your reasons which COULDN'T be explained but i was tired and just ate up whatever your reason was because i thought we were already done long before his explanations.

I accidentally found his instagram account, 

not long after our breakup, which is locked. I knew he created it not too long before i found it because I have searched his name before but there weren't one of his account, neither his followers and following numbers were that much for someone who're long in instagram. What surprised me to death was, his profile picture was him, with a girl, which later i found out that she is indeed his 'new' girlfriend (which was his ex-girlfriend too), thanks to my friend who informed me that his whatsapp profile picture are indeed him with the said girlfriend i saw on instagram. By then, i deleted all of our photos that we took, and blocked and deleted your contact right away.

Did you know how I feel at that time?

Anger? Mad? Sad? Dissapointed? Well, i couldn't handle it. That's when i lost my mind, and confident too. I felt deceived, ugly, humiliated, you name it all. I keep wondering what could possibly go wrong with us, what's wrong with me, am i not beautiful enough, am i not worthy enough to be loved, did he hate the gift i gave him, did he hate the way i talk, did i complained to much, and so on, which is not good. What's good is that i wasn't able to show him to anyone just yet and i thanked myself for doing that.

Yes, people, I was already cheated but he cleaned up his mess and image well before i found his shits. That's when i mad not only at you, but myself as well for letting a douche came close and messing me up. I might took a screenshot and made you as laughing stock with my cliques, but very very deep inside, i was very, very ashamed in front of them.

You may see me like i'm not affected by it at all. You may see my internet persona as a cold, witty, sarcastic and not caring about lovey dovey things at all. Hey, even if i did, the person i wanted to know the most won't know and didn't care at all so, what's the point? But really man, you can never tell a person by its photos nor what they posted on social media accounts because that's only show what they wanted to show.

The feel of knowing that you were cheated and deceived are humiliating, I must say. I am trully an idiot for believing a person so much and sadly you probably don't even know i already found your shit since then, because you even had the courage to sell a FCKNG concert tix to me after all the things you did :) i tend to avoid any confrontations and dramas plus we were already done so i don't want to ask you anything about that.

After all that, yes I kinda talk here and there with some guys but we were going nowhere. But you and all your mess keep popping up on my mind, make me angrier even more, because we already created so much memories before i learnt where the erase button is. Many things remind me of you, and deep down in my heart i hope i could meet you once again, face to face, just to hear your clear explanation of all these. But you seem happy with your girl now so I don't want to bother you with my not so important rants. I just hope when we destined to meet each other some other time, i won't ge remembered about things you've done anymore, I hope i'll laugh it off like it doesn't affect me at all, and you are just ones of my lesson learned i have to learnt.

Until we meet again,


A

Inception

Pernah gak sih kalian tuh mimpi kalo kalian lagi mimpi? Hah gimana lagi coba itu bahasanya gak mudeng, bingung jelasinnya. Jadi langsung aja ya tadi pagi asli gue baru nyadar banget setelah malam sebelumnya gue kaya super down parah terus gue bawa tidur aja, abis itu gue mimpi, mimpinya adalah.. mimpi bagus deh pokoknya kata orang mimpi bagus gak boleh diceritain keseluruhan soalnya ntar gak bakal kejadian (masih aja percaya ginian wkwk - bodo).

Gak deng ujung-ujungnya gue akan cerita juga kok disini. Nah jadi, di mimpi itu ada orang, gue tuh disitu kaya kenal banget pokoknya sama ni orang terus gue kebangun, gue nyadar itu mimpi and i was like "lah itu siapa anjir gue gak kenal" lalu yaudahlah gue beraktivitas seperti biasa dan ditengah-tengah itu gue ketemu orang yang di mimpi tadi, inget banget ketemu kaya di coffee shop gitu gue juga bingung kenapa bisa end up disana. Dan reaksi gue dalem hati kayak "ealah ini toh yang ada di mimpi gue, aneh banget gue bisa mimpiin dia, kenal aja nggak (turns out the said person has a twin brother when we met). Yaudah kan selesai gak gue ambil pusing lagi.
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jeng

jeng

jeng

jeng
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Gak sampe situ aja guys ceritanya. Jadi tadi siang menuju sore pas gue baru aja mau siap-siap cabut keluar rumah, gue baru nyadar kalo gue ketemu twin brothers pun cuma mimpi. In fact hari ini gue literally gak ketemu siapa-siapa, ke coffee shop pun nggak, bahkan gue pun gak tau siapa twin brothers di mimpi gue. Aneh ya? The least i could remember about that dream was that the twin brothers are quite good looking and neat, their faces are a bit chinese, one twin wears a blue shirt and then i forgot the rest. Kayaknya gue kebanyakan pergi ke area Jakarta Barat deh sampe kebawa mimpi ketemu Kokko-koko lucu^^

Treat or Truth

Good evening, folks!

Seperti biasa hari ini gue mau buang sampah aka unek-unek di blog

But i'm not really sure if i could really spill everything here since this blog is up there in the internet world where anyone from everywhere basically could read what i wrote (if they knew the url, of course) Dan maaf-maaf kalo bahasa preman gua agak keluar ya aduh gak bisa banget pake bahasa yang menarik dan berestetika tinggi (gimana mau dibukuin nih blog)(gadeng canda)

Jadi. teman-teman dan saudaraku. gue. baru. belajar. makin lo gede. makin mahal tuh. harga kejujuran. mihil banget.

Everyone cheats and be cheated. There's no in between. Lo mungkin ngerasa udah jujur, tapi apa orang sekitar lo udah jujur sama lo? Dan lo yakin, yakin banget? There are no 100% truths in this world. Adalah pasti poles dikit sana sini biar menarik atau looks pleasing di mata orang.

Dan kadang orang yang gak jujur tuh malah jadi lebih agresif gak sih dari yang jujurnya? 

Entah jujur sama diri sendiri atau sama orang lain. ASLI deh sekarang tuh ya gue kalo ngomong cerita jujur ke orang-orang aja pilih pilih. Takut euy tadinya mau ringanin beban malah ngasih kartu joker ke orang lain. Dan apa ya curhat remeh temeh ke orang lain sebenernya gak bantu-bantu amat ringanin beban gak sih?. Respon default orang-orang tuh pasti cuma "yaampun sabar ya" "pasti bisa kok semangat" udah, paling basic.

Ada juga yang keliatannya care banget nih sama masalah lo, ngasih saran ina inu eh ujungnya nyari celah buat personal gains. Itu gak jujur. Atau bahasa lainnya gak ikhlas mau bantuin.

Atau ada yang sotoy, kayanya tau banget gitu yang diomongin, padahal nyicipin bidangnya kaya apapun ngga. Itu gak jujur juga.

Atau kalo bahas hubungan romansa tuh kaya yang selingkuh misalnya? Maksud gue tuh...orang-orang ngapain ya selingkuh tuh gue masih gak ngerti. Biar apa? Biar dikata cakep? Biar dikata masih laku?. Terus yang bikin kesel biasanya yang model gini nih kalo hampir ketahuan suka lebih defensif sendiri, parnoan sendiri sama pasangannya atau sama orang lain. Yang salah siapa yang marah-marah sampe playing victim siapa. Kan bikin ketawa. Orang ngapa-ngapain, eh ngana curiga sendiri. Gue tuh udah apal sama orang kaya gitu sampe-sampe gerak geriknya pun, bikin gue ngakak aseli kepedean banget sok polos padahal mah gue juga tau lagi apa kaleee. Tapi kalo yang ini sebenernya buat that one particular person sih HAHAHAHA bodo amat bodo imma let it all out. I'm so done sama orang yang kayak gini soalnya.

Gue juga gak ngerti ini jelasnya ngomongin apa, tapi yang jelas gue nulis ini karena ada bentuk kekecewaan dari orang-orang sekitar gue. People i used to look up to, people i used to adore. But fine, people changes, so do I. Anda-anda semua gak jujur sama saya, kenapa saya harus jujur. Emang sih ujung-ujungnya gak solutif  dan not a very wise decision, but oh well orang orang yang bohong sama saya pun gak peduli. Intinya TRUST NO ONE BUT YOURSELF, oiya jangan lupa juga minta petunjuk sama Sang Pencipta semoga kita selalu dikasih petunjuk yang benar. Aamiin

Calon Sarjana Ventilasi Industri

Jadi selama gue kuliah di K3 gue, untuk semester ini, gue ambil mata kuliah ventilasi industri. Matkul wajib tuh. Yang ngajar Bapak S yang keliatannya sangat rigid padahal sih chill af abeyz. Cuma yagitu kadang ngajar sendiri, ngasih soal sendiri, ngerjain sendiri aja gitu di papan tulis.

Di mata kuliah Ventilasi Industri atau singkatnya vendus ini kita diajarin cara memperhitungkan dan mendesign ventilasi udara di tempat kerja, mainly design local exhaust, yang emang udah signifikan zat kimia apa yang kira-kira berbahaya di Industri tsb yang bakal dibikin ventilasinya. So far lebih seru dari belajar Manajemen Bising Getar semester lalu sih, ngitung juga tapi gak ada bayangannya. Disini imajinasi kita main banget, jadi ngukurnya gada patokan khusus yang penting ideal sama tempat kerjanya seperti apa. Problemnya sendiri adalah, ya designnya itu. Apa udah ideal sama tempat kerja kita nanti atau belom, tipe hood, tipe slot, luas area, itu kita yang ngira-ngira udah ideal atau belom. Harus ngitung dari mulai udaranya baru masuk banget nih di Hood-ventilasi, di duct, di elbow, sampe nanti keluar dari fan ke alam bebas.

Keliatannya sih simple tapi pas mulai ngitung dari mulai masuk "Hood" sampai ketahap "Discharge" bisa ngabisin 5 lembar kertas bolak balik. Gimana ga boker rumus

Kaya contoh gambar diatas, itu Local exhaust 2 hood, terus nanti ditiap jalur mesti ngitung loss-nya berapa. Gitu deh pokoknya mending ngitung berapa kali kamu di PHP-in si dia daripada ngitung ginian. Terus lagi kalo lo dari step 1 which is baru nyari Velocity Capture di ujung hood yang itu tuh (liat di gambar), salah, terus lo udah ngerjain penghitungan sampe kebagian Branch, mending bundir aja pake pohon ketela. Tapi setelah pertemuan ke 7, gue udah lumayan ngerti sih walaupun belom diluar kepala. YANG BIKIN MULES LAGI buku panduannya tebel banget kayak Kitab Pengakuan Dosa. Dan buku itu beneran kepake kalo di kelas pas dosen ngajar jadi ya itungannya rugi kalo gak bawa pas matkul ini. Huft dilema.

Oiya tantangannya lagi, karena hitungan untuk design satu local exhaust itu ribet dan kompleks, plus ada step-stepnya jadi akan sangat rugi buat gue kalo gak masuk 1 pertemuan aja. Ya yang lain juga mikir sama sih kaya gue. However, kalo udah ngerti sebenernya fun sih, tapi tetep not my taste (ngitungnya makan umur nek) doakan saja semoga UAS-nya gak nyiksa karena denger-denger dari senior tahun lalu doi ngasih soal suruh ngitung local exhaust 5 hood (ya anjir brb siapin kertas kosong 1 rim) fix beres matkul ini gue bergelar S.Vd aka sarjana vendus.


Regards,


AMN

Announcement

hai
apakabar blog
ih sebel ya sekarang blogger udah gak terlalu rame jaman gua smp rame banget blogwalking dsb dst

ini blog juga udah jarang keurus sih haaa talk to my hand
tapi, kayanya gue gada niatan delete-delete post  terus re-branding blog gue deh. Let's keep it as it is. Lagian gue gada bakat tuh design design aesthetic slash hypebeast-ish style gitu. Apaan 8 tahun punya blog isinya gada kemajuan, tidak memberikan inspiresyen bagi kawula muda Indonesia hhh malah nyampah. but it's ok yang baca juga gada kecuali tuan tuan malaysia yang ngiklan di chat box sebelah kanan gua bisa dilihat ya teman-teman

Tanpa mengurangi rasa malu dan hormat, blog ini juga ga akan gue delete. Yep, altough i never really promoted my blog elsewhere other than my close friends, itu juga cuma temen smp, tapi blog ini akan gue keep. Entah sampai kapan, tapi ini bisa jadi lahan refleksi diri gue sih dulu tuh gue setai apa atau sewise apa atau buat nostalgia-nostalgia lucu aja. Dulu, i'll keep my mom updated with my blog tuh circa 2009 beliau suka baca sampai gue harus ganti url beberapa kali karena some posts contain curse words and cringed stories which is embarassing. Let's keep this one as my personal slash semi public diary/time capsule/my life storage and yadda yadda you name it.

DAAAAAAAN gue berencana bakal supeeeeer nyampah sih disini. Kayak sebulan posting beberapa posts gitu loh, because i realized my other sns such as twitter, ig, path, snapchat itu bikin gue insecure untuk share-share hal yang menurut gue tuh ''i'm going to tell anyone about this'' tapi disatu sisi ''but this person, and that person, oh and those friends too, don't have to know'' ngerti kan, biasalah sns lain tuh ladang pencitraan (dan gue-nya juga yang males update apapun, males dikomen orang-orang). However, blogger is no different either, seenggaknya gabanyak yang follow dan update juga, and i don't have to be afraid to share cringey stuffs here.

Kebayang aja gitu kan, Allysa, F, 35 with one daughter and one son liat blog ini terus kayak ''anjir..'' ya gapapa gaakan malu kok ngga (terms and conditions apply).

OH iya mau cerita tentang bokap gua ah tapi di next post aja ya kalo gua masih inget, abisan ntar keluar konteks dari tujuan post ini, so let's end this post by saying

nakal gaboleh, jangan bego by awwwwwwllysa

Ha

Hi,

I don't know if people even reading this nor my previous posts but i'm just gonna write this anyway.

Ha ha ha

Gak lucu.

Sebel gue akhir akhir ini jadi cranky banget parah, moodswings gak jelas gitu deh which is def not a good sign ever like what's going on with me?????????????????? Yes i'm on my period rn but i think that's not the ultimate reason tho? I never felt something like this even on my period days before. Like, maunya nyemprot orang-orang, apapun bisa bikin wa emosi. Jelek banget inisih parah kalo gini terus gimana ngilanginnya ya. Dan lagi, gue kalo lagi cranky, terus sebel sama orang, jeleknya gue nih ya, beneran lho gue bisa jahat sama orang hhhh nyusahin. Jangan-jangan usut punya usut gue ada darah tinggi? eh iya gak sih?????? should i get my blood checked soon???????

Trust Sounds Like Trash

I feel like i've been stabbed for million times bcs of this.

I know this isn't only about me but still, don't you think you've crossed line, Miss? Don't you ever feel guilty over this even if its just a bit? I mean, you played victim and went all whining crazily and loud over something worse but then you do something worst the latter which left me with nothing but dissapointment. I thought that you were the star of my night, the guide to my path, and the sun of my shine, but then again i've never been so wrong in my life.

I. really. really. feel. bad. for. him. Heck, i really really feel bad for myself for once again trusting someone who i thought would never do that kind of thing behind my back [but i still knew it in the end anyway]. I love you. I surely do. But do you really think me won't know all of these with your obvious act around me after all this time?
Do you really think i wouldn't know?
You think that i'm dumb, don't you?
Have you ever thought how do i feel?
Or how does HE feel if he knows what you did behind his back?
When he's gone for a day and then come back home with his tired-face-but-still-managed-to-smile just for you?

These questions oftenly come to my mind when i think about you. About us. I might come off as that tough girl who seems careless and silly. But I, as a human, have feelings too. I can feel pain. It annoys me when i think that you put me as that dumb girl, struggling with her pocket money with young mind who think that this kind of things don't matter for me. No, lady. You're definitely wrong this time. There are more amazing things that i should worry about, like, what will I do after I graduate, or when will I ever meet Park Chanyeol, face to face, or where to cut my old and oily hair BUT THIS SHOULDN'T BE ONE DAMMIT but why thanks to you I got my lesson learned and  I once again lost interest to interact with people bcs they will only bring you dissapointment after you give them your trust.

You know, Human are the scariest living thing on planet. Like, you can't never guess what will they do later after they know all about you. Your life, your hobbies, your fear, your happiness, and your weakness. These might come chasing you one day and destroy your life in a matter of seconds. Like mine. In the end, the only thing that they care about are their ego. So ya, as you know, I'm a human too. I'm one of the scariest living thing on planet. I got tired in putting others feeling first before mine. Why? They don't even try to put theirselves in other shoes, and why would I?? I might as well put my ego first before everything.

And this is why, my friends, I have trust issues. I mean why trust people when you have your self who you can trust anytime?

HAPPY EID MUBARAK!

Saya selaku owner blog bersama rekan saya, Chris Hemsworth ini mengucapkan Minal Aidin Wal Faidzin buat seluruh rekan muslim di seluruh dunia!

Guys!!!! Gimana puasanya kangen aku gak hehehehehe >.< ENIWEI Chris Hemsworth beneran di Jakarta, di PI terakhir beritanya, too bad dia gabisa liat gue karna ga kesana :( mungkin dia ingin merasakan bagaimana gebyar lebaran di Jakarta. ANIWEI MIAN untuk semua kesalahanku Chingudeul! Annyeong!

Nyaris TGIF

Oi tadi masa di sekolah gua ada presiden tinju dunia gitu dah presentasi anti narkoba, terus ada pertandingan futsal sama tambang sama sekolah sebelah diiringi dengan live music dari sekolah kita. Seru banget pertandingannya cungguh cumpah cius enelan.

No.

Sebenernya mah bodo amat sih sama pertandingannya tapi tadi...pas live music...doi main bass coy. Wkwk biasa aja sih ch, hehe. oke...................

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HOIIII GAK BISA. ASGDHJKL:DFDSADDASDSA gakuadhhhhh keren parah HAIHAIHISHIHAIHSIHSI Plis plis plis balikin kayak dulu plis bilang kalo dia dan dia itu cuma hoax plis plis plis.Opotoh ndo opo, sudahlah biarkan dia dengn barikadenya hahahahahhahahahahahah udah selesai gitu aja dehya makasih. dahdahdah

Wassalam

T_T

I really need to get over you. But, something always bring me back to you. I'm  totally, mentally, fucked up. ASTAGA!!!!! WOY!!! Gangerti lagi ah. Se-gabisa-itu <\3 Btw fotonya lucu nged. Hehe. foto siapa icha......Gatawu.............................I'm feels so dumb.

K. *inhale* *exhale*

Forgive him, forgive myself, value of my life. Come on dude, don't stick to the past for someone who DOESN'T EVEN CARE that you're still there for him. Nuff said. -Xx

:/

Sob yea sob sok asik. Hai hai hallo.
Under pressure nih. Gimana ya. Gakuku lagi. Aduh aduh tekanan dari mana-mana. Ada yang ngeganjel. Mungkin seperti suatu keinginan atau apa ya gangerti. Sangat mengganggu. Kepikiran terus. Gakngerti sampe kapan ilangnya. Tapi, gabisa diomongin atau gak boleh diomongin lagian gak punya hak apapun saat ini. Bahkan di blog gue sendiri. Cerita sama siapa juga yah tau banget responnya pada bakal kayak gimana. Jadi? percuma cerita. Dan gangerti juga kenapa bisa terus terusan ngeganjel kayak gini. Kadang malah kepikiran yang ngga ngga. Yang gamungkin. Yang mustahil. Mau semedi di goa mana juga gabakalan kejadian. Gimana dong? Kadang pengen cerita ke stranger aja. Gatau kenapa hehehe. Atau cerita sama doraemon, dengan baik hati langsung ngasih solusi instan. Asik yaga? Aela apasih icha. Terus kalo gamau cerita ngapain di share? Gatau deh ah.

OEEY

Hi. Met malem^^

Abis baca posting yang dari jaman phytecanthropus erectus..aih kangen ya pas gua masih jadi jadinya. Apa coba jadi jadinya-_- icha lagi pengen random posting aja nih. heuheu

Alhamdulillah hari ini puasanya kuat yah walaupun sampai ga ditraktir d'cost deh sama Ivanna :( jadi kedapetan nonton hi5teria nya doang.

Oya, hi5teria ini kan genrenya hororr. Buat lo penggemar horror sih level cemen banget. Tapi buat gue, pilihan menonton film horror adalah salah satu pilihan yang gaakan gue pilih'. ngerti kan maksud gue? Tapi mirip phobia gitu ceritanya, dibagi 5 berseri. Yah Indonesia apa sih yang gak ngikutin.

Dan lo tau apa? setelah nonton itu gue bukannya pulang, malah nyusul nyokap gue yang ada di sarinah, biar di rumah gak sendiri. Padahal lagi puasa. HaHaHa tertolol2012. Ah sudahlah lupakan.


terus apa ya....akhir akhir ini jadi tidur malem terus gara gara kebiasaan ulangan. Wah pas ulangan belajar sampe malem ya cha? H4h4h4h4h4h4h sini tabokin pantatnya dulu. 10% belajar 90% kurang ajar. Hasilnya mari qana'ah saja seperti biasa.

Terus lovelife gimana cha? UHUK UHUK UHUK batuk bu? Minum obh cimbi kid, semriwing.EA. Malu ah :$
 Apasih geli banget IUWWWWWWWH wkwkwk icha kenapa.......ah ga gimana gimana coy hufffft biarkan mengalir seperti air aja, selonin selonin. EA geli banget anjir:(

Udah ah ngablu gini. Wassalam

Effin friday

Njir coy hari ini ada yg curigaan gue kira dia tau kalo gue nananana. Gue kira sama itu taunya bukan. Alhamdulillah! tapi tetep aja gue malessss kan jadinya. Klo sekarang abang begitu gue nya jd keinget yg lama lagi kan. maaf ya bang tp abangnya jg yg bikin aku inget lg :(. mana td ada yg bikin malu gr2 ELU LEMES njir tau ah bang satai monkay. Eh dapet info. ada yg anak tunggal. Eh tunggu. Gapenting juga kayanya. Trs kemaren. wkwk tau ah jd pengen beli lg cm mau ketemu ------ <- gatau siapa namanya. idiot :'D

ahh skip. SELASA MEEEEEN SELASA!!! Okay over dramaqueen in action. Knp selasa? gue uts. OMG tapi blm climax. Ini yg climax-> gue uts duduk didepan. Belom nyampe klimaks. JADWAL HARI KAMIS IPS MTK SENIBUDAYA. WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWHTHFCK!!! Ah tau ah aku mah pasrahin aja ya kalo bisa syukur, gabisa yaaaaa...syukurin. Ketai ah ksl stt seenak jidad lokata otak gue kaga limit apah? Ah knp omongannya kaya preman tankus sih. Trs td disekolah, gue skrg apa-apa ngomongnya jadi 'kamu sih...gamilih tirai 3 kan jadinya zonk' cacat mental cacat mental. Trs yg minta exc.link ntr ye lg males. HEHE maaf :3

see ya bye bye

eh tunggu...

hng engga jadi

Te.o.di.way.i

ASSALAMUALAIKUM NO OINK FOR ME!!!

ups melenceng....

hai hello alloha!

Guess what sodara, hari ini aku 2nd months (Y). Makasih semua yg udh ngucapin di twitter, fb, sms. Makasih Ninda! elwe ngucapin pertama lowww kwkkwk Makasih juga Aul ucapannya ;)

Udah ah shut it, malu sama tetangga.

Eyamasa, hari ini gue kerumah ratih. Nah ini dia yang tolol. Jadi gue buka fb pake hp diee, trs dia ngesearch nama seseorang gidu. Eh malah nulisnya di status. Demi apapun, tolol abis njir. Kalo kebaca orang gmn? Mslhnya itu adalah nama seseorang yg......adadeh wkwk gjls abis. Tapi untung masalahnya bisa keatasi.

Anyway kelompok gue jdnya bikin stir-fry meat gt. Td udh nyoba loh lumayan enak meskipun kurang garem. Ngahahaha. Ngomong-ngomong gue kalo bosen suka search 'management games; di google trs mainin deh. Apa-apaan kurang kerjaan abis lo! Turun bro.

Sucks. Gabisa gue nerima kenyataan kalo besok minggu, berarti setelah minggu hrs ada senin :"( okay drama queen in action bgt ye. Jujur kaga kangen apa2an sm sekolah. Mau suasananya, orang2nya, ampe pacar jg kaga. Jahat bgt wkwk gadenkkk temen2nya mah iye, gurunya mah lempar husssss.......

udh ah malu. eh btw laper....-_- yaudah gapenting kan ya dadah c. u. byebye

bored may

hello may! may itu byk yg ngeselin ya! yg sok penting jg banyak! spy, stalker, copycatters, selfish apalagi! tabahkan hambamu yaAllah....oke stop berkeluh desahnya. dua hari ini badmood mulu yee gua, apakah pms? pns? bts? ngawur. sbnrnya, aku adalah seorang gadis patah hati. gdeng gagitu sinetronisme amat, emgnya gue kaya......... #frontal. bego, disensor gt dblg frontal. tekadku, dapat memusnahkannya dari pikiranku:3 amiin! sudahlah, eh eh gue baru nambahin widget looklet dong di sidebar blog gue. trs? mau dibilang hebat? layaknya org baru pny bb yg diomongin trs di update-an twitter? ops tak maksud menyindir siapa siapa:3. heiya blm bljr bu tit, bsk ulangan. sembarangan, nama guru disingkat singkat. ye napalu? idup idup gua suka suka gua, ngapa jd lu yg gasuka sm idup gua? kaya lo mau nanggung dosa idup gua aja *ratih style*

mksih bgt buat geng inti, yatno, yani, sannah yg udh tenar jg hshuwhsuhwushushuasuhwsu tawa macem apapula itu. demiyabi, ngakak dewa siwa sampe muncrat-muncrat duduk sm lo pada! gabakal ada perkampungan babi tanpa kalian! unyuu chynkqlianclalw:-** oke fine norak. eh ralat ye, gada yg namanya geng deng, ntar ada yg ngadw ke bhekha ucuckcucckuc. gendenk nih lama lama. ini niatnya gua mau nyari tugas bu utami ngapa nyasar ke blogger.com? ups ga sengaja ke klik seeh hohaoah

terakhir,
MAU MAU MAU? YA SAYA MAU


YA, i really want a leather jacket like that!!! and of course i need much $$$$, give me give me money, honey.......

thathaxoxogoodbyegtg...
wassalam

assalamualaikum

oke sebenernya gue bingung mau post apa, cm karna lg bosen & ngerasa 'yah ampun nih hidup cape gue' so gue posting blog deh. sok asik. njut...akhir-akhir ini gue lagi mellowww bgt kaya melly goeselow. hus nama org diubah-ubah. oke ya mulai ngeluh aja ya daripada ditwitter kepanjangan macam apapula. biar gada yg protes. fine gue dibikin kesel sm byk org akhir-akhir ini. OHYA skrg gue punya fans club loh namanya top and sexy ladies disingkat toppnxil (dpt dr @dioooor) gdeng najis amat. ngarang bebas gue, gada kok fens kleb fans kleb-an. yah sebenernya toppnxil adalah sekumpulan inisial 3 org yg gue jadikan satu. pokoknya tiap gue lewatin mereka zenggggg langsung pada liatin gue. bukan gue malah over confidence ya tp risih bungut nih oooi kaya pencuri kesaannya. oh iya aku kan pencuri hati para pria. dih menjijikan abis lo macem yatno eh ampun sesepuh. trs gue ksl sm kzkz. trs sm seseorg yg kdg bkn gue bakal seneng buhngut and then tomorrow langsung down parah HA mihi emg tuh orang. pokoknya dia itu org yg bsa bikin gue bkn sgala macem tweet deh. lupakan. dia hanyalah....sampah masyarakat. hupsy

back to the journey. iyeaaa. akhir-akhir ini rasa kekeluargaanku dgn keluarga papa c.bok semakin meningkat. aku selalu menjalin rasa kekeluargaan dgn geng inti yaitu sanah, yatno, dan yani dan aku, panggil saja nur. namanya terdengar sangat indonesia sekali bukan? atau mungkin sedikit menggeser ke bawah menjadi...alay*ups. tapi aku dan temanku tak perduli. kami tetap tertawa hingga cepirit bersama, kami tetap menghormati nsfu sang kepala suku, kami tetap suka bernafas seperti babi hingga yani salah satu member inti kami mengatakan ia berada di perkampungan babi. menjijikan bukan? oke stop mengetik layaknya mengerjakan tugas bahasa risna willy (wonka) hus. gdeng, kalo yg bilang geng inti atau sejenis geng itu bohong. ga ada geng kok. cm sekumpulan anak cupu yg kumpul dan tertawa hingga lepas landas bersama:3

trssss...akhir akhir ini gue selalu nyanyi lagu-lagu yg gamutu. mulai dari lagu armada yg dibawa kemana nah ini pasti gue kena karmada. lagu yang apaitu liriknya 'tetap di satu c.i.n.t.a' woy uluuuuy bgt cih sok jijik. tiap hari dinyanyiin juga. ohya sama lagu salah satu produk susu pertumbuhan remaja. lo pasti tau bgtu gue nyanyi 'cewe cowo beda, beda usia, beda nutrisi...' whatthef.inghell!

but, woy tunggu dlu woyyy...!!!!
ini gue blgnya kagak tau mau post apaan ngapa malah jadi bejibun begince? ah memang oops oleezo rasanya endang bambang gulindang

andaikan...

sejenak gue merenung (sejenak=setengah jam lebih). kayanya pengen gitu ikut les nonformal yg sesuai hobi. lagi dengerin lagunya black eyed peas - boom boom pow jadi pengen ikut dance. yah, bokap mana mau liat anaknya loncat-loncat pake hotpants?. dengerin lagu make it mine - Jason Mraz, jadi pengen les gitar kaya @amirands. yak tujuan utamasih biar bisa bawain lagu itu doang sambil main gitar. kan kesannya keren. tapi nyokap gue bilang, 'les yang lain aja masih bolos gimana nambah lagi?' trs denger lagu Vanilla Sky jadi pengen les drum. tunggu dulu allysa, orang setolol apa yang rela buat band dengan merekrut anak bengal kaya gue sebagai drumernya? cari di google pun ga akan ada yang mau. abis gitu, denger lagunya Once - Simphony Yang Indah jadi mau bisa Biola atau Piano. Nah bokap gue pasti bilang, 'ngapain ikut les yang kaya gitu? ga ada manfaatnya buat di akherat' gimana kalo pas denger lagu Tik tok - keisha gue jadi pengen les nge-dj? ah tau gue yang keluar dari mulut bokap pasti 'mau kerja dimana kamu gedenya, kalo kecil kecil nge-dj? diskotik? kegiatan kaya gitu nambah pahala?' ' duh yah puhlease? ah nasib calon anak pesantren. Tuhan, inikah takdirku? lebay lo sen.

ah ceritanya madesu, mending ganti topik. sekarang gue lagi uts. yak, dan gue masih sempet-sempetnya posting. gadeng ini gue save dulu di draft mungkin gue publish hari jumat besok. tadi gue ngakak parah duduk uts belakang adhit. kan bikin poster gitu tentang perpisahan, dia niat gambar sekolahan, eh karna waktu mepet cuma sempet gambar pager sama pohonan doang. stt masa kapan tuh? setelah runtuh? ha ha begok ah. trs tadi main lempar-lemparan penghapus sama ari. woakakak kaya nontonin anak idiot seeeen. penghapus yg dilempar ari ke adhit selalu bikin gue ngakak.ada yang masuk mulutlah, kena gigi lah, pala HA HA HA TUHLUHLL. btw, gue berasa masa depan udah cerah aja padahal mtk pkn belum belajar sama sekali. buku pkn pun menghilang ntah kemana. liat ajanih sen, sekarang pleya pleye besok glagapan looo. mpos lo sen ha ha. ah biasanya saat-saat terdesak otak lebih bekerja. yee sotoy. ah ngmgng musen mulu nih iyalah musen kan muka sendal. lantas kenapa? gapapa. yaudah mau belajar dulu untuk besok, wish me luck for tomorrow, thatha:-***

gadeng gasecepet itu. ini sambungan dari postingan gue yang kemaren. ceritanya emosi untuk posting membludak disini. dih musyen sok penting abislo. ye boam. tadi gue atletik. &&&& guess whaat td ada noh si musen xpxpxxpxpxpxpxppxp sen bibirnya pink bgtt sen masyaAllah pasti pake lipstik cap njonja musen. hus canda deng. what? good bye? oh yes, don't miss me;)

WELCOME FEBRUARY!

hey, bulan februari ya skrg?

hm berarti ada valentine yah? so? gue ga ada pacar ini. dih suramamat. mpos lo mpos. ho ho

OIYA! *selonbe omong-omong bulan februari berarti MASTENG BANTAR KAWUNG ULTAH! HAHAHAHA gatau kan lo siapa? yaudah diem deh. gausah cotti! easelon bro

&&& about sekolah ya, UH1 smester 2! alhamdulillah mtk, lumayan. ipa, it's oke. plkj, ya gaburuk. agama, alhamdulillah lebih dari setengahnya saya gabisa. hehe. trs tadi ada raziyeh dadakan gidu ucukucuk rubiks kena 1, kaos kaki kena 2, trs yg bodohnya sampe sampe kolor renang adit disita apa coba-_- komik gue kena si-alaaaaaaaan. katanya ada yg bawa roko gt anak 81 deh kalo gasalah. yah syg mending buat gua *galah kibul* sabar ajaya semua ada hikmahnya (gayanya leni).

trs trs lovelife. hm tarizem keaknya gamasok deh. abis gue galiat dia. nyeh. dikelas gue baca komiknya salsa ttg ramalan cnta gtde. EH! taogaseh aries cocok loh sama leo wikikiki iyeah asik! berarti gue cocok dong ya samaa oho sut ah. trsss tadi gue kan bimbel. pas udh pulang berdoa dol0 kan tuh, trs ya masaaaa arabitem............ah pokoknya asik bgtt deh ganyesel gue masuk walaupun telat :))))

ohiya maaf ya tdinya mau take award dari chika tp ternyata udh kelamaan-_- hff yasudah ntar ajadehya

xoxo ;p

Allysalt

hoi sobat!

lama tak bertemu ya? hello, dunia maya seneng kali lo ga nyampah. sut ah selon bro. eh nyet banyk bgtt kejadian sebenernya. terutama yg berhubungan dgn letter T. eh tau ah ntar aja ngmgn itumah. trs gatau deh sekarang banyak yang berubah temen gue. yaudasih lo cha sampah aja belagu. eh Indonesia negara demokrasi coy, sesampah-sampahnya gue, gue msh punya hak bicara. hah apa? lupakan. EH AJAIB LOOH GUE MTK DAPET 95! AMAZEEEENKKKK. ucapkan? alhamdulillah! yah norak dah yaaaah. yaodasih biarkan dia asik dengan dunianya. banyak nih yg mau disampaikan, tapi cukup dengan klik&follow http:twitter.com/allysarp anda akan segera tau! percayalah! apapulalah macem pujskiiionoo. sut ntar ada yg tersinggung. trsyatrss skrg tentang letter T. keaknya udh banyak yg tau trmasuk RIVAL GUE! wo srisunartowwww dasar ah. trs kemaren gue denger suaranya. nyet melteng guweh meltenggg. yaodasih gue mau les bro, males bro tapi gue mau ketemu arabitem bro. mid term test belom belajar pula, mati ajalo sini! lahsongong, anak mana sih lu? middle finger nih buat lo!!!! heh nyante lah bro. ah pasilis homo abadi. muak ya, dadah

milikku~~

mereka milikku. heh? siape? mereka adalah ;

1.abhwang owjewwhk


ininih slalu stia tak kenal lelah. thankyouu veryveryverrryyyyyy much ya with abang yang satu ini. jangan lebay, ntar t2 marah ah. ha-bitch(?) dia selalu menemaniku kemanapun aku pergi ewkewkewk hari ini ajaya gue udah 3 kali naik owjewhk-_- mygoowwdhhh gue udah jadi pelanggan setia setiap saat layaknya rexona. jadi tuh gini, tiap gue pulang les itukan malem ya otchomaticc angkowdh udah gada sooooo, saya memilih dia sebagai pengantarku agar sampai dirumah. apakah nantinya akan tumbuh benih benih asmara? tak tau. jangan sampai. o-g-a-h-,- ya pokoknya gada lo ga pulang deh gue bang jek(?) lopyupulll

2.my 'bapoex' pencil case


keterangan :
merah;tanda tangan tipe-x seorang bejat gavlz (yoga-yg ngaku sendiri-_-)
birumuda;my name by leni
pink;ulah tangan-tangan jahil yang saya sebagai pemiliknya sendiri gatau-_-
hijau;mulai pudar karna usia-_-"

yaks, itu dia kondisi ter-apdet dari tempat pensil kuwh. ini juga neh yang paling setiaaa. asal lo tau yaaa, ini tmpt pensil udah dri jaman gue klsss 4/5 sd gidu, jadi haraf maqlum kalo misalnya rasa prihatiningsih anda tergugah karna tempatpensil ku minta di taro dimuseum sekali. gatauya gue males aja beli yg baru. suer deh udah pw. trss tmpat pensil ini juga bnykk bgtt kenangannya. dia saksi bisu gue pas gue nyoba-nyoba nyontek sm temen pas ulangan. dia saksi bisu gue pas gue lagi bercanda sm temen pas guru nerangin. dia saksi bisu gue saat gue nyimpen contekan di dalam tubuh hitamnya. dia saksi bisu gue pas gue diceramahin abis-abisan sama emak karna pr jadi numfuk. dia saksi bisu gue pas gue lagi fallinlove sama..... ah bnykk bgttlahya pokonya gabisa disebutin satusatu uuu sygbgtsmkm wkwkw apaseh jejek galocoh wo yadah udahan ah syesyewww bloggyana!

nb;hari ini ngegaul dulu di beyfek sama LeniLiaResyaNindaDhifa. nton aer terjun pengantin. ah emang dasar nyalimu seperti maling mentimun, gue cua nonton 1/3 filmnya nyahaha-,- trs abis itu pulang naek ojek trs les hm emak gue baek bener ninggal gue jadi gue (lagilagi) harus naik ojek ke tempat les-_- ah ojek memang solmetku(?)